Utter Humiliation

Petunia half-opened her eyes due to the loud sound of her alarm clock. She stood up reluctantly and went to her desk to turn it off. As she went back to her bed, she was scratching her head realizing that she couldn't be late again due to an important exam on her first period class.

"Pepay, gumising ka na nga diyan. Tatanghaliin ka nanaman." Her mom screamed from the outside of her room.

"Opo 'nay, gising na 'ho ako!" She replied petulantly.

Petunia opened her door and came out with a dreary disposition. She lifted her feet indolenty making her way to the bathroom. She reached for the shower knob and twisted it until droplets of water started to come out. After finishing her shower, she toweled herself dry, wrapped the towel around her body and approached the breakfast table. She grabbed a big piece of pandesal, snapped it open from the middle and stuffed it with fried scrambled egg. She drank her milk hastily while still chewing on her food. She then hurriedly went back to her room to get dressed after finishing her breakfast.

"'Ma, pasok na 'ho ako." She told her mother and avoided her sight.

"Oy, oy, oy, Pepay, sandali nga. Anong kalokohan yang nasa mukha mo? 'Bat ang kapal kapal ng make-up mo. Gusto mo bang pagtawanan ka sa klase niyo?"

"'Ma naman. Dalaga na 'ho ako 'no."

"Bahala ka. Basta sinabihan kita. Hala cge pumasok ka na."

She reached for her small mirror inside her shoulder bag while waiting for a jeepney to arrive. She checked her face and thought about what her mom told her.

"Di naman makapal e. Si 'nay talaga, ayaw nakikitang maganda ako." Petunia facetiously told herself.

When the jeepney came, she returned the mirror inside her bag and replaced it with a reviewer for her exam. She chose to be seated at the far back-end so she could concentrate with the review. After waiting for a few minutes, she glanced outside through the jeepney's window and saw the traffic light change from yellow to red.

"Para 'ho sa tabi!", Petunia told the driver.

"Anong para-para! 'Di ka pa nagbabayad!" The driver yelled attracting other passengers to stare at her.

"'Wag naman 'ho kayong manigaw. May barya 'ho ba kayo sa isang libo?" Petunia arrogantly asked.

"Asan ang isang libo mo?" asked the driver.

"Teka lang po. Eksayted kayo masyado e." She replied telling the driver to wait while she looks for the bill. Unable to find one, she returned to the driver grinning and said in a humble tone,

"Nagastos ko na 'ho ata. Eto na lang 'ho palang bente."

Copyright (c) 2005 Nick Vargas

We Won!

Our company held a badminton tournament last Saturday. This is the first sports tournament I've ever joined and excitement is an understatement to describe my state of being during the tournament.

Eliminations

All matches are composed of 2 sets with 1-11 scoring system per set. A pair shall play against all other pairs in their respective level among all teams. There are eight skill levels with Level 1 as the highest. A pair who wins a set shall be awarded 1 Match Point. A pair who wins 2 sets shall be awarded 3 Match Points, otherwise, should either pair win a set each, they're awarded 1 Match Point each. The top 2 pairs who garner the highest number of Match Points in their respective level shall enter the Championships.

We played level 6 and won all three elimination games which gave us a total of 9 Match Points hence bringing us to the championships with an unbeatable record. =)

Championships

All games in the Championship Round per level shall be best of 3 sets race to 15 points. If the set is tied at 14, the first pair to reach 17 points wins the set. A pair who wins a set shall be awarded 1 Match Point. A pair who wins the game with 2 sets to none (2-0) shall be awarded 3 Match Points, otherwise (2 sets to 1), shall be awarded 2 Match Points and the opponent with 1 Match Point. The team who garnered the highest number of Match points in the Championship Round will be declared the Overall Champion.

We won the first and second sets of the game thus giving us a total of 12 Match Points and made us the Level 6 Champion. Our team had the most number of level champions which made our team the Overall Champion! Kudos to our team.

The next working day, our manager sent us an email message:

Thanks for participating in the Badminton Tournament. I was waiting for the official announcement pero unahan ko na - Yey to our project. We had 4 out of 6 pairs playing in their level finals, and two pairs being level champions!!!

Nick and Richard - Congratulations to the level 6 champions!! No mercy sa mga kalaban!! Grabe pinagod ninyo kalaban niyo sa championships!!

Note: Portions of this blog were edited in order to not include company specific details like project name in accordance with our Client Confidentiality Agreement.

Of Bizarreness and Drollery

He lifted his head from a quick nap on his right arm. He opened his eyes and waited until the blurry image of his surroundings become crystal clear again. He took a quick look at his watch and realized that his thirty-minute break was almost over. He lifted the black pen on the right side of his desk with so much effort, as if lifting a fifteen-pound weight. He immediately reached for his handkerchief on his right trouser-pocket and wiped away the clear liquid that has been gushing out unexpectedly from his nose since his day started. He placed the opposite side of his left palm to his neck and felt an unusual high temperature from his body. He then reached for his headset, wore it and pressed a button.

"Thank you for calling. This is Mike speaking. May I please have your first and last name?" He said as if forced to do so.

"Yeah, it's Lilibeth Donahue." The woman from the other end of the line answered.

"Thank you for that information Ms. Donahue..."

"It's Mrs. Donahue. You can call me Lily." She interrupted.

"Okay Lily, how may I help you today?" He asked as he spread his left arm on the desk, placed his forehead on top of it and closed his eyes again.

"I don't know how to set the clock on this VCR. I was wondering if you could help me with that."

"No problem Lily." He said without any hint of genuine interest to help the lady.

"Okay, may I please have your clock?" He opened his eyes realizing what he just said.

"What?! You want my clock?!" She confusedly exclaimed.

"Oh my god! Am I calling technical support?" She continued.

"Yes, mam. This is technical support." He answered thinking of a better way to escape the embarrassment.

"Let me now transfer you to another agent. Thank you for calling. Have a nice day."

Copyright (c) 2005 Nick Vargas